Hey I watched the KOF movie finally and...

[rikasaurus]

This movie was so bad. Did you ever watch something and start off :| and then after it's over, you were mad as hell? That's how I felt. Now I need to go play some KOF to cleanse my mind of this abomination. This movie is not even so bad it's good like the Street Fighter II movie. it's just BAD. The dialogue, the characterization, the outfits, EVERYTHING.

Excuse me since when does Mai use electricity? Last I checked, she uses fire. It's not enough that they gave her a flat chest....they didn't even get her elements right.

Iori was painfully, PAINFULLY out of character. Why was he with Mai, again, and why would she care about the whole story with the Sacred Treasures if she never really directly interacted with them (save Chizuru) (and on top of that, why would Iori be worried about anyone, let alone, MAI? Who the hell is Kai-o? Terry...just oh my god what the f-- His hat colors weren't even right.

Rugal...that entrance was so lame. I was like OH MY GOD DID HE JUST SAY PEEKABOO. Then he stabs Chizuru something is really messed up here. And funny how the sword didn't even have blood on it afterward. And don't get me started on the fight scene he had with Iori. And then he cuts his own hand with the sword and licks the blood....Oh, and there was blood on the sword this time. I DON'T EVEN

I lol'd at Terry's text to Mai, though. It was so corny. Saisyu's in a mental institution or something? Whaaaaaaaaat? And no one seems to consistently say his name correctly. Shishu, Saishoo, Saiseeyoo, shooshoo, shiishii, doodoo, crap, etc etc. And Kyo is white throughout the movie, but in a flashback, he's Asian? CONSISTENCY FAIL.

And....Iori and Kyo don't know each other. Seriously. Oh, and Saisyu suddenly comes out of his....coma or whatever and tries to strangle Iori when he sees him. And then he dies. or something. idek.

Oh yeah. Dimensions, guys. They have dimensions. Kinda makes me think of the MK movie. And Mature and Vice are total lesbians who are pretty out of character at first. I think that's the only thing they got right in this movie. However, Mature is the man and Vice is the weepy uke, which is wrong. They also don't know who Rugal is, which is also wrong. And why he wore a hockey costume I will never understand. Oh yeah. There's also brass knuckles and tonfas. And Rugal has flaming kicks. I guess these shenanigans take place in KOF 93 where Vice is the main character. And apparently, Vice had Ramon's and Duo Lon's phone number. Why? ¯\(°_o)/¯ Must be more stuff from KOF 93.

Back to Terry, who Mai works for(?????). He's a CIA agent who's very, very brunet. With very, very short hair. And looks very, very old. And is also trying very, very hard to be funny and is failing. And Mai and Iori continue to stalk Kyo. And LOL @ Iori calling Kyo a 'half-breed'. AND SUDDENLY, IORI AND KYO'S RIVALRY IS REVISITED BECAUSE IORI "KILLED" KYO'S FATHER. And then Kyo takes Mai for a ride. Then Mai man handles him, so to answer your question, Kyo, yes. She fights. 

DIMENSIONS DIMENSIONS DIMENSIONS

And is Rugal Scottish in this movie or something? That accent is standing out like a sore thumb. And his pimp suit is atrocious

The Riot of the Blood thing? Jeezus. All he really did was slap the shit out of Vice.

Iori, how do you know what it takes to be a Kusanagi?

Kyo's costume looks pretty gad damn bad. And instead of a highschool dropout, he's a motorcycle repair guy. Okay.

Anyway, why did they bring Chizuru in with a wheelchair and then she stands up?

And...apparently, Saisyu had Orochi blood WHAT THE HECK IS THIS PLOT? MY FATHER WOULD NEVER HURT ME! IT WAS THE OROCHI

Instead of Kachosens and Power Waves, Terry and Mai fight with garbage, while Rugal goes to town with a baseball bat! And then Iori comes to save Kyo. No wait. AI OH REE. or is that Yori? What the fuck why can't this movie get anyone's name right?

These fight scenes look so bad. I swear none of the punches and kicks were convincing enough to make you think they made contact. Terry punched Vice in the face, but it was like her head moved before he punched her

That flashback where Chizuru, Saisyu, and Iori fight Rugal was pretty cheesy. How did Iori hit Rugal so hard that he was literally sent flying? Then he went to attack Saisyu, and that fight scene was pretty bad. Then it flashes back to the present and Iori and Kyo are fighting

Man. The special effects look atrocious, too. It's like they failed at CGI miserably. And apparently, Chizuru dies and Mai takes her place. This does not make sense.

So, tl;dr, A bunch of stuff bothered me and I give this movie a D for DAMN that movie was terrible.

Edit - lmao so many typos and grammatical failure up in here.

Comments

[luminous-manic.livejournal.com]

A D??? A D?!?!!!?

YOU'RE BEING VERY NICE.


I can't even BEGIN to describe what perils of hell I have witnessed.


It was so bad, it's dumbed my grasp of the English language to just one word: ".....really?"

[rikasaurus.livejournal.com]

Nice. It's what I do.

I actually wanted to rate it worse, but 'damn that movie is terrible' had a funny ring to it.

To counter your 'really', I was OH MY GOD-ing the whole time.

Now let's hope there's no sequel because I SWEAR TO GOODNESS IF THERE IS...

[luminous-manic.livejournal.com]

Just wrote the review. Give it a looksie.

[vergilol.livejournal.com]

I am loling so hard this movie sounds atrocious. jlkasdf.
NOOO WHAT DID THEY DO TO TERRY ;A; /weeps forever.

Oh man. What plot. WHAT PLOTTT. This movie. Now I'm scared to watch it.

[rikasaurus.livejournal.com]

Oh man. I don't recommend it, especially seeing as you like Terry. Just....oh my god no. I wouldn't even recommend watching it for lulz because there is none.

Atrocious is an understatement.

[rise-kujikawa.livejournal.com]

AAAAAAAAAWWWW BOO so sad to hear that ;-; I WAS ACTUALLY LOOKING FORWARD TO SEEING THE MOVIE and now I have serious doubts
I trust your opinion so idk if I'll even watch it heh...

[rikasaurus.livejournal.com]

OH GOD BELIEVE ME THIS MOVIE IS NOTHING TO LOOK FORWARD TO. I don't even recommend watching it for kicks and giggles because....KASDJCFGFBVSDA it's so bad.